for p parker

Hey Parker,

I hope you know that you are the best big brother there ever was. You love going to New York City. Your excitement is so alive the entire 8 hour car ride. This last trip you counted down the blocks (you meant hours, but insisted on calling them blocks). And when you first see the tall buildings, you giggle with excitement and kick your feet in joy.

Matilda gets all the attention. The entire staff at the RMH ooh and ahh at how she has grown and remember how tiny she once was. When we go to the hospital, everyone crowds around the mighty miracle Matilda while you sit quietly behind the scenes. When she fusses everyone tries their best to cheer her up, but when you fuss you only get shushed.

But don't think I don't notice or care how wonderful and patient you are. Because I do. I look back at you sitting quietly and my heart shines. I hold your hand, I rub your head. I let you push the buttons on the elevator even though I know they are covered in germs. I take you on special trips - just me and you to get milk at the store or down the street for a coffee and cookie. And Papa always makes sure to take you on a subway ride, just the two of you.

We know it is not easy to be such an amazing big brother all the time, but you make it look easy. You care for Matilda in the sweetest ways. You protect her from danger. You treat her like an equal. And you love her unconditionally. We know it is hard for you, just like it is hard for us, to worry about Matilda, to not know if things will always be this good.

Before Matilda was born, I didn't know if I could love someone as much as you. But the truth is, I love you even more now than I did then. Watching you as a big brother is one of my very favorite things in the world. So thank you Parker, thanks for being the most amazing little boy I have ever known. You are the best and I am so thankful to have you by my side.

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